How long can a narcissist be alone? Not long!

Most narcissists hate being alone, and crave external validation and attention. They often feel a deep need to be centre of attention, and they require constant supply from others.

The narcissists need for company is illustrated by their pushy attitude. They might refuse to take no for an answer, when they want to hang out. Call multiple times if you don’t answer. And treat any excuses you give with suspicion.

Even illness is no excuse. And if you’re ill, narcissists may try to convince you that you’re not. Like they can persuade it away!

If you live with the narcissist, then they may follow you round the house. Pester you when you’re on the phone. And knock on the door whilst you’re in the bathroom. Suffocating you in the process.

Why do narcissists hate being alone so much? Are narcissists afraid to be alone? Here’s several reasons why narcissists hate being alone…

Please Check Out The Following Short Video To Aid Your Understanding…

Narcissists Can’t Regulate Their Own Emotions

Narcissism is largely a defence mechanism. Where narcissists detach themselves from their emotions, to avoid pain.

But the downside is that they don’t learn to recognise or handle their emotions. Because they don’t have practice. Which is why many narcissists are emotionally immature.

Narcissists need people to regulate their emotions for them. To sooth them. And to tell them everything’s OK. Because they struggle to keep themselves grounded. So they keep people around them, to stabilise their emotions.

Scared To Self Reflect

When you’re alone, you have time to think and reflect. But narcissists don’t want to do this. In fact, the thought of it terrifies them.

Self reflection exposes you to your inner demons. And your flaws and mistakes. As you delve deep into your psyche.

Narcissists don’t want to see what’s inside, because it isn’t pretty. And they can’t face their flaws, because of their delusions of superiority.

Anything less than perfection, shatters them. So they’d rather bury their head in the sand, and ignore their inner world. Then they can kid themselves they’re perfect, and have no demons.

So narcissists recruit people to distract them. And help them avoid being alone, as much as possible.

But narcissists can’t always get their way, and are sometimes forced to spend time alone. So they often resort to things like alcohol, drugs, and gambling. To distract them from their own mind.

Fear Of Abandonment

Many narcissists have a fear of abandonment. Especially if they have borderline traits. And may live in fear of losing popularity.

This fear of abandonment is sometimes due to poor upbringing. Where they couldn’t rely on their parents.

They may also fear abandonment, because they know how much they need people. Even though they pretend they don’t.

It’s natural to fear losing something that’s important. And people are vital to narcissists mental health. Plus people are unpredictable, and may leave them at any time.

So narcissists insure against loneliness, by grabbing as many people as possible. And establishing an almost constant support network of several people. So they have plenty of options to fall back on.

Boredom

Most narcissists have a low boredom threshold. And need drama and attention to spice up their world.

Having people around them gives them more opportunities to alleviate boredom. Because they have someone to talk at. Someone to wind up, if they want drama. And someone to do things for them.

Narcissists Need External Validation

Narcissists need external validation more than most. Which is why they work harder on appearing successful, than they do on actually being that way.

Narcissists often get themselves into debt for new cars, a big house, and expensive clothes. Just to look successful. Even though the debt makes them poorer. To narcissists, the image is more important than the reality.

But you can’t have external validation without people. So narcissists need people around them, to tell them how great they are. And to be jealous of their “success”.

So they may gather people around, to fish for compliments, and make them jealous. To satisfy their bottomless need for validation.

Want People To Make Them Feel Special

To confirm their delusions of superiority, narcissists need to feel special – at all times. But being alone doesn’t feel special to most narcissists.

Narcissists often surround themselves with kind giving people. Who dish out compliments, and do them favours. And allow the narcissist to dominate the relationship.

This allows the narcissist to feel special and superior. And they probably fantasize that these giving people are beneath them. Which gives them a lift.

Narcissists Want To Look Popular

Narcissist are hyper conscious of how they appear to others. Even complete strangers. And they want people to think highly of them. Because this bolsters their superior false image.

Some narcissists use people as accessories, to look popular. Because if they seem popular, then they must have good qualities. Which helps them attract more people.

So the narcissist may pester and cajole people to accompany them whenever they go out. And gather as many people as possible. Just to look good.

You may have noticed that most narcissists avoid going places on their own. They try to drag people with them, wherever they go. Even if they have no interest. I’ve even seen narcissists take their girlfriends and children to the gym, just to watch them train!

Narcissists Need Someone To Mirror

Narcissists are blank canvasses. Empty vessels. And they don’t really know who they are.

Narcissists create a façade. An outward character, that’s everything they’re not. And this character needs careful construction, because it’s not coming from a genuine place within.

So narcissists need people to mirror. Preferably people who are kind and empathetic. So they can copy their traits, and fake their empathetic qualities. Because if they don’t, they can forget how to act “normal”. And if they don’t fit in, no one will give them the time of day.

Final Thoughts

Having a narcissist in your life can be draining and time consuming. Because they expect you to drop everything when they’re at a lose end. And spend time with them.

Narcissists don’t care if you’re tired, ill, or not in the mood to hang out. They’re so desperate for attention, they’ll do almost anything to get it.

Narcissists need people far more than most. Yet they mistreat them, and push them away. Which is biting the hand that feeds them.

Narcissists act like you need them more than they need you. But it’s a bluff, and they know it.

They do this because they want you to believe that THEY have the power. Then they can dominate the relationship. But the reality is, they need you far more than you need them. And all the power is actually yours.

Please CLICK HERE For Why Narcissists Hate It When You’re Ill

Why Narcissists Hate It When You’re Ill