Narcissists aren’t the most truthful people. They have delusions of superiority, so they embellish things to appear “better” than they are. They’re also exploitative. So they distort the truth to gain unfair advantages.
Narcissists seem more prepared to lie than the average person. Sometimes they even lie for no particular reason. Perhaps it makes them feel powerful.
Here’s some of the things narcissists typically lie about. Let me know what you’ve heard in the comments at the end of the article…
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How Many Sexual Partners They’ve Had
Narcissists typically inflate how many sexual partners they’ve had to their friends. Particularly if they’re a guy. Narcissists like to be the best at EVERYTHING. And they see the numbers game as a competition. So they inflate their numbers to “win”.
With a romantic partner, they might deflate their numbers. The narcissist often portrays themselves as sweet and innocent to disguise their flirting and infidelity.
If they can convince you they’re innocent, they have an easier time getting away with affairs. “You’re crazy. If you knew me, you’d know I’d never do anything like that.”
Narcissists numbers vary wildly, depending on who they’re talking to. And what they want to achieve. To their friends they might have had 100 sexual partners. To their new sweetheart, it’s only 5.
Their Earnings
Again this is a numbers game, and the highest wins. Narcissists make BIG claims about their earnings. Yet always seem broke. Hmm.
Some narcissists boast about their wealth one minute, then cry poverty the next. This depends on whether they want to impress, or play the victim. Narcissists may cry poverty to get out of paying for things. Or to gain sympathy and favours. But next breath, can’t help but show off that expensive pair of shoes they recently bought.
Their Qualifications
I’ve heard many narcissists claim they hold qualifications they don’t have. It’s easy to claim qualifications, because no one asks for proof.
Narcissists feel the more qualifications, the higher value they are. And they like to be seen as high value. It also helps them bag the top jobs.
How Their Ex Treated Them
Many narcissists paint a picture of being poor vulnerable victims in past relationships. But the reality is usually the opposite.
Narcissist do this to lull their new partner into a false sense of security. How can poor little them do anything to harm you? It must be all in your imagination.
Past Glories
The past glories could be anything. Such as how all the women flocked after them. How they beat 3 guys in a bar fight. Or the top job they once had.
Some narcissists tell tall tales to sound more interesting. Especially if they want to impress. These are usually harmless, and can make interesting conversations. Narcissists don’t let the truth get in the way of a good story!
But after a while you realise that all these fantastical things can’t happen to one person. Especially someone who actually leads such an ordinary life.
It Was Your Fault
Narcissists fight tooth and nail to maintain their superior and perfect persona. So they don’t accept blame for anything that goes wrong.
Instead they blame others. Narcissists twist and turn facts to make it appear someone else was at fault. Anyone but them. They’ll even throw a “friend” under a bus if it gets them off the hook.
It’s particularly damaging when a narcissist behaves badly throughout a relationship. But convinces their ex the break up was their fault. It can leave them anxious and depressed, wondering how they failed so badly.
This prevents them from moving on and healing. Because they’re trying to fix faults that don’t exist. And ignoring the one fault they do have – allowing narcissists into their life.
I Promise
A narcissist may promise the earth. But don’t always follow through. This is especially true if they ask for something, and make a promise to secure the deal. For example, “I’ll pay you back next Thursday.”
The narcissist knows that a promise now, gets them what they want. They worry about fulfilling it later, if they worry at all. This is also known as future faking.
I Love You
Perhaps the biggest lie of them all. Narcissists will say “I love you” to coax the same response back. And to ignite the other persons feelings.
They like to draw people in to fall for them. Narcissists know that once they have someone feeling for them, they’re less likely to leave. Allowing them to unleash more of their narcissistic behaviours, and get away with them. Love is blind after all.
Please CLICK HERE To Learn The Patterns Of A Romantic Relationship With A Narcissist
I’ve Changed
If a relationship has ended with a narcissist, they might try to hoover you back in the future. Narcissists hate being alone. So they often go back to people from their past if they find themselves single.
Narcissists say “I’ve changed”, to persuade you to give them another go. And display their “new” kind and caring attitude.
Unfortunately this is fake, with the sole purpose of drawing you back in. They may walk the walk for a while. But once you’re involved, their old behaviours return. Unfortunately, narcissists rarely change.
I Don’t Remember
Many narcissists have memory issues. But they only manifest at convenient times. They might remember that bar of chocolate they bought you ten years ago. But fail to remember a holiday you paid for last year.
Narcissists hope to change history by distorting what they remember and what they don’t. They remember everything favourable they do. But forget anything wrong. And deny them to the hilt, if they ever come up in conversation.
I Feel Ill
Narcissists often pretend to be ill. They do this for a few reasons. Being ill makes them the centre of attention. They love everyone rallying round, asking if they’re OK.
The narcissist knows they can exploit their “illness”. Most people are happy to help someone in need. So the narcissist uses this to get their way.
Narcissists may also claim to be depressed or suicidal to gain attention. Or as an excuse for their behaviours.
My Life Is Great
Narcissists paint a picture of a perfect life. They have the perfect family who they allegedly dote on. The perfect house, car, job etc. Narcissists want the world to know how great they are, and how great their life is. Even though the reality is usually the opposite.
They especially do this after a break up in a romantic relationship. Narcissists like to prove they’re doing better without you. And prove their new partner is better than you. They create a narrative that all is hunky dory – even though they’re treating them the same way they treated you.
Final Thoughts
Most narcissists are exploitative, want to be superior, and need almost constant attention. Bending the truth helps them achieve these aims.
Some narcissists tell HUGE lies. So big that most people don’t believe they’d be so bold. So they don’t question them.
It’s not unheard of for some narcissists to fake major illnesses such as cancer. And milk the sympathy and attention. Only to make a “miraculous” recovery. But this is relatively rare.
Often narcissists lie to make themselves seem more interesting. Ultimately they want to be liked and respected. I once heard a narcissist claim he drove a tank over another soldiers car whilst in the army!
Whilst many of their lies are harmless, some are not. Some are designed to take advantage of you in various ways. So it’s worth taking what a narcissist says with a pinch of salt. They may be telling you the truth. But there’s a fair chance they’re bending it in some way.
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This is so important for people to understand. It happens daily
All the jagged edges it just disappear.
Why did they get all the love in the world because they would cut someone’s throat to give it and keep it as long as it measured up 2/3 twisted standards expectations yes I pulled two of those lines out of Trent reznor song who seems to always describe human concept of feelings and exacerbation of them with precision it is unmatched… JJ
My ex-path well it’s hard to say where one lie ended and the next one began. I’m still reeling from the absolute mind *****ery that occurred at the whim of his fancy. He Contacted my employer in a fit of rage because I began to be on to his game and threatened to go public with it. I didn’t find out until just about a month before I was fired. A long time friend of his somehow I made contact with this person whilst trying to come to a point of closure or trying to wrap my head around what the hell was going on He had left to Oregon to go see if his ex was still waiting on him. Don’t know how I knew that’s where he went. I just did. And it was confirmed. Well when I ended up getting in touch with this person he said wow your aren’t anything like he made you out to be. Went on to say there’s something I should tell you and he him hawed his way around it until I finally said just tell me. Tell me what it is your beating around the bush about. Well my ex straight told him he did this discrediting me thing at work. While there was this male Lp manager newly promoted with some misogynistic issues and basically was making my life a living hell because I expected consistency from someone that is supposed to be a support person. I was manager of a big box pharmacy. In a very high crime area and was making leaps and bounds by controlling the controllables. Took shrink from 10.1% to 1.7%. But this regional Lp manager was more about how he was so Much more efficient and vegan holding me to rules that he basically was making up as he went along. Me having no idea that m ex had already been disparaging me and concocting complete false stories. Well in any event they got me on not recording my time correctly. I was a salaried manager for 9 years and California Hd just begun to have us punch a clock and it was widely known that we just weren’t used to it. And I was working long long hours. But not recording them as such. There was no payroll budget for that And we were salaried. So they said falsified time sheet. Bs. I should have sued the company but it was like I was already in chaos with this scum of the earth. Who when he came back around he was appalled I would believe he would do such a terrible thing. I mean he went on and on and so in spite of knowing better I swept it under the rug. Mind you it still pisses me off. My daughter Hd been diagnosed with a pituitary tumor and was going through all Of these medical appointment then my insurance stopped. I still see red now when I think about how absolutely ruthless a psychopath is. And how they have zero conscience about anything they do. The lies. My gosh. I could go on and on because as we all know. They are liars. Period. They have little reason to be truthful. That would just shatter their world. Their delicate make believe world where they are just innocent victims and were so trying to help us but we just couldn’t be helped
Unfortunately Diana I’ve heard many tales of narcissists lashing out when they know someone is on to them. A “smear campaign” to make you lose credibility. They hope that by taking your credibility, no one believes what you say about them.
Most narcissists live in fear of being exposed. They know nobody would go near them if they knew what they were really like. So they usually either smear, or run and hide.
my ex spent a whole year before running off to be with her new victim that she had met on one of her online dating sites (plural!!) she totally destroyed me by telling our friends and acquaintances that she had to leave because I was so violent and abusive and she was afraid I might go too far one day, by nature I am a pacifist and cannot confront, a brilliant victim for a narcissist, they can walk all over you without argument, I am now in a constant state of depression and suffering from PTSD, she also stole over £300.000 from my bank account and has actually stated in court that I was the one who stole all of her money, she did have a single penny in her bank when I met her, I could write another 20 pages and not cover half of her lies and scams. Evil, nearly explains her.
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