To protect their fragile ego, narcissists create a false persona. And part of that false persona is being supremely powerful. Even if the reality is very different.

Narcissists fight tooth and nail to maintain this delusion. Because they must not shatter the false self they’ve created. This false self was created in childhood, and protects them from future harm. And makes them feel better about themselves.

Narcissists develop a number of tactics to feed their delusions of power. Here’s some ways I’ve noticed narcissists maintain their delusions of power…

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Surround Themselves With Weaker People

Many narcissists like to surround themselves with people they perceive as weaker. That way they can be the “alpha” of the group. And boss people around and feel powerful.

Most narcissists aren’t interested in a challenge. They want to feel powerful. So they select people to help them achieve this. People with weaker boundaries. People who are more compliant and easy going. And people less successful than them.

If these people are stronger than them in any way, they try and take them down a peg or two.

Collect Weapons

Some narcissists become obsessed with weapons. And build up huge collections.

These weapons make them feel powerful. Because they know the devastation they’re capable of causing. Even if they never actually use them.

Dominate Others

In close relationships, narcissists don’t want equality. They want to dominate.

They like to call the shots on practically everything. When you meet up. Where you go. And what you do.

You must quietly listen to how brilliant they are. To their problems. And their dreams and ambitions. But they won’t listen to yours.

Narcissists don’t want to concede any ground. In their mind that would diminish their power. And they’re not giving that away lightly.

Put Others Down

Narcissists like to put others down to feel powerful. Put them down to lift themselves up.

They sometimes resort to belittling people in front of others. This is a public show of “power”. In their mind they appear powerful to the audience, as well as the person being belittled.

They fail to understand that people are often repulsed by this behaviour. They’re so engrossed in power, they think everyone’s impressed.

Tell Lies

Many narcissists are economical with the truth. They exaggerate their importance at work. How much money they earn. And past achievements.

I’ve heard many claim to have qualifications they don’t possess. In their mind this boosts how important they appear. Increasing their personal power.

Drink Or Take Drugs

Some narcissists turn to drink or drugs to feel powerful. Drink and most drugs help reduce inhibitions. And this makes them feel powerful, like they can take on the world.

All their doubts and insecurities dissolve when under the influence.

Associate With Powerful People Or Organisations

Most narcissists are hierarchical in their thinking. And consider people either beneath them or above them. Not equal.

They treat those beneath them with contempt, and suck up to those above.

Some narcissists like to be around powerful and successful people. They feel powerful by association. They want to be seen around them. And considered one of them. “These are my type of people.”

It’s not uncommon to see the narcissist sat with the managers at the office Christmas party. Even when they’re much lower in status.

Gravitate Towards Jobs With Power Or Control

Narcissists gravitate towards jobs that are associated with power. Such as law enforcement, politics, the medical field, the clergy, and leadership positions.

Whilst they may pretend they want to make a difference, they just want power. A uniform and an important job title feed this.

In many of these jobs they get to tell others what to do. And they have to do it. Narcissists don’t see themselves as a coordinator. They’re the “boss”. Now do as you’re told!

Status Symbols

Many narcissists use status symbols to feel powerful. A big powerful car helps a narcissist feel big and powerful.

Expensive designer clothes. A big house. A young attractive partner. These help narcissists maintain their delusions of power and success.

Narcissist frequently go into debt, to buy things they can’t afford, to impress people to feel powerful and important.

Triangulate

Narcissists gain many benefits from triangulation. Power is one of them.

Triangulation is essentially playing two people against each other. Typically they stir trouble between them, and act as confidant to both.

They usually split them from each other. So the narcissist holds all the power.

They might exaggerate or lie what one has said about the other. Or stir trouble in other ways.

And because they’re not in contact, the narcissist has full control of the situation. And the narcissist fully appreciates the power this gives them.

Be Unfaithful

A narcissist might triangulate in their love life too. They love nothing more than having two love interests vying for their attention.

Usually both parties have no mutual contact. So the narcissist plays them off against each other.

The narcissist has a lot of power in this situation. They can make them feel jealous of each other. Show off how great one is, to gain more favours and compliance out the other. Making them compete for their attention. The narcissist is in the box seat. And they know it.

Learn About Law Or Religion

Some narcissist like to learn about law or religion. Law and religion are often associated with power. Plus they can be used as tools to gain power and control.

A narcissist knows they can influence and intimidate people when quoting the law or religion. They can tell people what they should and shouldn’t do.

And feel they have the full power of the law, or the might of God behind them. A great boost to their feelings of omnipotence!

Narcissists Instil Fear

Many narcissists frequently go into bad moods. And display this for everybody to see.

They WANT people to fear them and walk on egg shells. They feel powerful affecting everyone in this way. Everyone frightened of their mighty wrath. There’s nothing like instilling fear to feel powerful and God like.

And if they’re not in a bad mood, many narcissists like to intimidate. Again preying on fear to feel powerful.

Final Thoughts

Narcissists find many ways to maintain their delusions of power. And this explains lots of their behaviours.

Narcissists create a false persona as a means of protection. And this false persona is powerful and successful.

Narcissists don’t want to admit they’re mere mortals. This would destroy the self image they’ve spent years nurturing. So they create illusions of power to themselves and those around them.

They grab as much power as they can. Whilst giving away as little as they can. All whilst maintaining as normal a functioning image as they can.

Normal thinking people hate the thought of others being frightened or intimidated by them. But narcissists aren’t normal thinking people. They thrive off peoples’ fear. Even at the expense of pushing people away.

Narcissists LOVE attention. But they love power more. And they’re willing to sacrifice attention in the name of power.

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