Grandiosity is a key element to most narcissist personalities. It’s where the narcissist feels vastly superior, for no apparent reason.
In day-to-day life, narcissists hide most of their grandiosity. Particularly with people they’re not close to. But they can’t hide it indefinitely. So it pops out in different ways.
In this article I’ll discuss my observations of narcissists grandiosity. And how it shows itself in day-to-day life…
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Conversations
Narcissists often display grandiosity through their conversational style. And that style is – overwhelming!
Narcissists are utterly fascinated with the words they say. And assume everyone else is too.
So they dominate conversations, by doing most of the talking. And steer them to their favourite topics – which is usually themselves.
Narcissists don’t like listening to conversations. Because everyone is beneath them. And they have little to offer. So it’s their duty to dominate the conversation. Because they have such a wealth of knowledge to share.
Narcissists seem blissfully unaware that people don’t care about the minute details of their day. Or the things only they’re interested in. In their mind, they’re highly important. And everyone hangs on their every word.
Hero To Victim
Many narcissists play the victim to gain attention and favours. But at the same time, they can’t resist letting out their grandiosity. So you get a contradiction of words and actions.
The narcissist might cry poverty one minute. Then show off their new designer jacket the next.
They may boast about how well they’ve got their life together. Implying they’re superior to you. Then expect you to help them with their problems.
Narcissists flit between hero and victim, to get the best of both worlds. But beneath it all, they “know” who’s number one.
Narcissists Expect EVERYONE To Focus On Them
As I know you’re aware, narcissists focus on themselves most of the time. But on top of this, they expect others to share their enthusiasm.
Narcissists demand superhuman levels of consideration from others. Despite not giving a damn about anyone else. And they don’t see the hypocrisy. Because they believe they’re vastly more important.
There’s many ways I’ve seen narcissists expect fanatical focus from people in their life. A favourite is when they have a “problem”. And rather than share it, they expect everyone to read their mind, and know.
The narcissist usually gets offended when no one recognises their “plight”. And may kick up a fuss, complaining that no one cares. Even though all they had to do was tell people.
This is because the narcissist is frustrated that people aren’t constantly thinking about them. Like they think of themselves. So they kick up a storm, to force it to happen.
Narcissists Are NEVER Wrong
Narcissists are so grandiose, they don’t believe they’re ever wrong. Which of course is unrealistic. So the narcissist has to force it.
They deny any mistakes they make. Engage in illogical circular arguments when losing a debate. And pass the buck, even when they’re clearly at fault.
Leisure Time
When it comes to a night out, narcissists often aren’t satisfied with going to a local bar. Especially if it’s their birthday. They must travel miles to some swanky place. And drag as many people as possible.
Narcissist are all about appearance. So to look popular, they invite half the world. And pressure them to attend.
Narcissists attach value to inconveniencing people. And the greater inconvenience they cause to the greater number of people, the more important they feel. So they invite as many people as possible, to travel as far as they can. Just to feel important. Some take this to extremes, and expect everyone to travel abroad for their birthday bash.
Narcissists are also grandiose about day trips. And aren’t content walking in their local park. They must travel miles to do the exact same thing.
Narcissists don’t do leisure activities for the sake of them. They’re a statement of how great they are. Both to themselves, and to others. So they make them difficult and complicated, just to appease their grandiosity.
The Judge And Jury
Narcissists grandiosity is illustrated by their belief that they’re the sole custodians of right and wrong. And their judgement is final.
Narcissists believe they have the right to punish people. Because they’re the arbiters of truth and justice. So what they say, goes.
Narcissists don’t consider that other people also think they’re right. And there’s many different points of view. In the narcissists mind, they’re right, and that’s all there is to it.
I’ve heard narcissists say “I know I’m right”, about difficult subjects. With no evidence to back their claim. Which is a staggering level of grandiosity when you think about it.
Suckered By Their Own Grandiosity
Narcissists are often suckered by their own grandiosity. And pay over the odds for certain products and services.
If a credit card is billed as “platinum”, then the narcissist must have it. They upgrade to VIP memberships, even though they don’t need them. Just to assert their grandiosity.
Narcissist might be sweet talked into buying a new car they can’t afford. Or a home that stretches them to breaking point. All to appear more successful than they are.
Perceptive salespeople often twig on to the narcissists grandiosity. And take advantage of it, by telling them their product or service is for important people like them. And the narcissist is sold.
Risk Taking
Narcissists believe their own hype so much, they feel the universe owes them. And they’re destined for greatness, despite doing nothing of note.
This causes the narcissist to take unnecessary risks. In the firm belief they’re blessed with good fortune.
The narcissist may neglect their health. Because they’ve inherited a superior body. Or they may gamble more than they can afford. In the belief they’re destined for a big win.
This grandiosity causes many narcissists to struggle functioning in the real world. Because when you keep rolling the dice, bad things WILL happen. And the narcissist rarely learns from their mistakes, because they find someone else to blame.
Narcissists Paranoia
At its extreme, narcissists grandiosity can leak into paranoia. And they might become concerned that the government or other important agencies are spying on them. Or out to get them.
The narcissist believes they’re so important, it stands to reason that these high profile agencies are focussed on them. Even though they lead a relatively normal life.
Over time, these thoughts can ramp up. And their paranoia can descend into delusional thinking. Increasing their detachment from the real world.
Conspiracy Theories
Narcissists grandiosity may lead them to believe conspiracy theories. Which may be a result of their paranoia and delusional thinking. But also a consequence of the conspiracy clubs that target grandiose thinkers.
You may have noticed that many conspiracy followers congratulate themselves on being “woke”. And talk about the lesser “sheeple”, as if they’re inferior.
The top conspiracy theorists make a good living. And lure in disciples by telling them they’re superior for having the special knowledge they bestow. And many narcissists lap this up, and use it as proof that they’re better than anyone else.
Scams
Narcissists sometimes fall for scams because of their grandiosity. For instance, they may fall for foreign dating scams. Where someone half their age wants to marry them. But needs money.
The grandiose narcissist never questions its validity. Because in their mind, they’re wonderful. So of course a model half their age wants them. Who wouldn’t?!
So they part with their cash. In the belief their magnificence is finally being recognised. Never considering it might be a con. Until it’s too late.
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I dealt with an elderly cousin who actually said to me, “If I had been able to go to that prayer meeting in Jenkinsberg (GA, USA), President Trump would NOT have lost the election.”. I was mortified, I politely excused myself and left. I had refused to accompany her to the prayer meeting. WOW, I could not believe the gandisoe thinking. I am no longer her volunteer caregiver,
They truly believe the whole universe revolves around them!