Narcissists know which side their bread is buttered. And many gravitate towards their boss for friendship.
Most bosses are lonely in the workplace. Because let’s face it, who wants to be friends with their boss?!
But bosses are human, and naturally don’t want to feel lonely half their waking life. Some narcissists move in to fill this vacuum. But of course it’s not because they feel sorry for their boss. They don’t have emotional empathy. It’s to take advantage of their friendship.
Narcissists are hierarchical, and acutely aware of the pecking order. And aim to climb as high as they can. They know that befriending their boss provides a shortcut for their ambitions. Plus it gains them many other benefits.
Please Check Out This Short Video To Aid Your Understanding…
Power Without Responsibility
Being a bosses friend is ideal for narcissists. They gain the trappings of leadership, without the responsibility. Heaven!
Narcissists harbour delusions of superiority. And constantly seek confirmation of these delusions. Being the bosses friend allows them to continue believing they’re superior.
Narcissists deep down know they’re not as capable as would like to be. And many can’t be bothered with the responsibility of leadership. They just want to cherry pick the advantages without the hassle. Being the bosses friend gives them this.
Narcissists like colleagues walking on egg shells around them. Fearing they may report back to their “friend”. Like they’re an extension of the boss. They want to feel powerful.
Many become more bossy than their position dictates. Acting like they’re in charge. But when it comes to the responsibility of leadership, they’re not interested.
Gain Unfair Advantages
Narcissists gain many advantages being the bosses friend. They whisper in their ear their sob stories. And the boss naturally feels their plight (unless they’re a narcissist too!). Because who doesn’t care about a friend in need?
The narcissist enjoys a different set of rules to their colleagues. Getting away with more lateness, sickness, and bad behaviours. They learn what to say to the boss to get what they want.
If it’s a weaker boss, they might be pushy to get their way. If the boss is compassionate, they play the victim. If the boss fears rejection, they may threaten to end their friendship.
A friend of the boss is more likely to gain promotions and pay rises. Even if they’ve done nothing to earn them. And more able to finish early and start late.
The narcissist becomes one of the few people that listens to the bosses problems. But it’s not because they care. There’s only one person they care for, and it’s not the boss!
They’re collecting data. Because the more they know about the boss, the more of a hold they have over them.
If the narcissist has secret information the boss doesn’t want releasing, they’ve struck gold. Because there’s pressure on the boss to keep them sweet.
Almost Untouchable
Narcissists use their friendship to become almost untouchable in the workplace. As I’m sure you’re aware, narcissists are usually difficult at work. But when conflict arises, they’re in prime position to get in first with their version of events.
Narcissists are experts at subtly bending the truth. Just enough to paint themselves as the poor innocent victim. Shifting the blame from themselves to their colleagues.
And once the boss is primed, colleagues words fall on deaf ears. Because the narcissist pre-empts their complaints. And defends them with distorted truths and twisted logic. And because they’re friends, the boss is more likely to believe the narcissist than the other workers.
This is frustrating for the rest of the work force. Because it’s them that have to put up with the narcissists temper tantrums, bossy behaviours, and toxicity. And not only are their complaints unheard, they’re probably blamed for causing them.
They Want Everyone To Know
Narcissists usually want EVERYONE to know they’re friends with the boss. They don’t hide it or play it down. They flaunt it.
Narcissists need external validation to feel good about themselves. They’re not happy keeping “achievements” to themselves. In their mind, what’s the point of having something if you can’t show it off? And the same goes for “having friends in high places”.
Narcissists believe friendship with their boss elevates them above the “ordinary” workers. So they like to be as public as possible, shouting from the rooftops and dropping it into conversations. Then strutting round the workplace like they own it. And in their mind they probably do.
The narcissist shamelessly flaunts their “friendship” to their colleagues. Rubbing their noses in it. Hoping to make them jealous to confirm their superiority. It’s tactless and pointless, but it feeds their ego.
Final Thoughts
Narcissists are transactional when it comes to relationships. They don’t want friendship for friendships sake. They want their pound of flesh.
Narcissists use relationships to get their needs met. These are usually control, attention, and other benefits that float their boat. Such as favours, money, and power.
Befriending the boss gives the narcissist many things they want. Far more than befriending those wretched underlings.
Narcissists can share in their bosses power and influence. And manipulate them for all they’re worth.
Narcissists cause untold misery to many people in the workplace. And whilst they’ve got their grip on the boss, they’re even more destructive.
If you find yourself affected by a narcissist friend of your boss, then it’s worth considering pastures new. Because your welfare is low on the agenda.
Please SHARE And Sign Up To My Newsletter. Sharing Pictures Of Fluffy Animals Is Nice. Sharing Info On Narcissism Is Life Changing!
Please CLICK HERE For How To Cope With Narcissists In Your Workplace
Or Scroll Down For My Most Popular Posts (Mobile)…