Social media presents a new world of exciting opportunities for narcissists. It’s never been so easy to gain praise and attention. Present an enhanced false self to the world. Or spy on former lovers. All at the click of a button!

I thought I’d write an article on my observations on social media and narcissism, and how narcissists use social media. Here’s what I’ve spotted, how narcissists use social media…

Please Check Out This Short Video To Aid Your Understanding…

Self Promotion

Narcissists are all smoke and mirrors. They like to create the impression they’re happier, more capable, and more successful than they really are. And social media is perfect for this.

Narcissists on social media can post snap shots of their apparent perfect life. Creating an impression much better than reality. So if they go on holiday, you can bet all the best bits are plastered all over social media.

Narcissists carefully select the best pictures to make themselves and their life appear idyllic. If they’ve been going to the gym, then expect gym selfies. Which have been shot at the perfect angle and lighting to make them look as good as possible. Even day trips out and going to a burger bar are fair game.

Narcissists also post exaggerated stories of their successes. To boost their ego, and gain admirers.

Public Displays Of Empathy

Narcissists like to publicly play the kind, caring, and empathetic role. And social media is perfect for this.

They can post articles about social issues. Often without actually reading them. Express support for the vulnerable. Share their “wisdom”. And show the world how kind and conscientious they are.

Narcissists can subtly boast about their good deeds too. “I was on my way dropping off shopping for my grandparents, when I ran into an old friend.”

Or ask for “help” giving help, “Does anyone know the number for the Salvation Army, because I want to volunteer?” Google it!

Narcissists deep down know there’s something different about them. So they fake being “normal” to fit in. And faking empathy is top of their list. Which is easily achievable on social media. Because you don’t actually have to do anything but type.

Narcissist Attention Seeking

Social media is an ideal hunting ground for attention seekers. And narcissists LOVE attention.

Narcissists are creative in their attention seeking efforts. They might cause an argument. Play the victim. Or pretend to be offended by someone’s posts or opinions.

Some show pictures of new purchases. Or fancy places they’ve visited. I’ve even seen some with pictures stood next to cars that aren’t theirs!

Narcissist usually post often, to maximise their exposure. They’re bottomless pits when it comes to craving attention. They can never get too much.

Attention is measured in likes, shares, number of friends etc. And these metrics are important to narcissists. The more the merrier.

Many privately complain when others don’t like their posts. I once had a narcissist friend complain to me that my sister, who didn’t even know her, never liked her pictures.

Narcissists seem acutely aware of who does and doesn’t like their posts. And get annoyed with those that don’t support their attention seeking ways.

Validation

Narcissists need huge amounts of validation. In their mind, nothing has value unless everyone knows about it. They can’t just go quietly about their business without telling the world.

If they do something good or achieve something, then everyone should know about it. If something bad happens to them, then the whole world should know about it.

Social media is obviously great for broadcasting what you’ve been up to. And even better for gaining responses, such as pity or congratulations.

Play The Victim

Narcissists love playing the victim, because it gets them attention and favours. And social media is a great place to do this.

At the touch of a button narcissists on social media can broadcast how awful their life is. And attract as much sympathy and help as they can. Then sit back and lap it all up.

Covert narcissists in particular like to play the victim, because it’s an easy way to gain attention and control others. Without having to be forceful about it.

Rather than bully people to do things for them, Covert narcissists can post about how awful their life is. Then wait for the help to come flocking.

All Or Nothing

Some narcissists go through phases. They’re on social media all the time, then suddenly disappear. Then re-appear, like a bolt out the blue.

There’s a few reasons for this. They love the drama and attention of “announcing” they’re quitting. And watching people beg them to stay. Plus the attention and mystery of disappearing, then triumphally returning, “Hey you’re back! Where did you go?”

Another reason they might quit is when they’ve done something to hurt someone. They may disappear to avoid being exposed. Narcissists try to maintain a credible public profile. They want to be liked. Because they need attention. When their credibility is threatened, they often lay low.

Some narcissists never go on social media. At least not as themselves. Often it’s because they’ve too many skeletons in their cupboards. And fear people from their past showing up and exposing them.

Others lead secretive lives. Such as being in two or more relationships. Or pretending to be more successful than they really are. For these, it’s easier to abstain from social media. Rather than covering their tracks, and risk getting caught out.

Narcissists Sock Puppets

Some narcissists resort to setting up fake accounts. This is usually to spy on an ex without them knowing.

Narcissists don’t want to lose face by being exposed for spying on an ex. They don’t want to appear too keen. So they hide behind fake accounts.

Narcissists like to know if an ex is single. How happy they look. And how vulnerable they seem. They like to know whether they’re a good candidate for a hoover, should they need them in the future.

Hoovering

Social media is also the perfect platform for Hoovers. As you’re probably aware, narcissists are never truly done with an ex. They know if they’re low on narcissistic supply, an ex is a great back up plan.

The narcissist may start with a casual “how’s it going?”, before revealing how much they miss you, and how you’re still soul mates. And remind you of the “good old days.”

Or they might try a subtle approach, and send an “accidental” blank message, or like a picture. And hope you respond.

Either way, social media is great for a sending hoovers, dressed as “innocent” communication. It’s much easier than knocking on your door, or picking up the phone.

Research

Narcissists are empty shells of people. They don’t know who they are. So they copy or “mirror” people they want to attract. Especially new or potential lovers.

A narcissist thinks nothing of faking the same hobbies, interests and opinions, to draw someone in. Social media is perfect for research. All the information is at their fingertips.

A narcissists can learn what music you like. TV programs, films etc. And can pretend to like the same.

There’s nothing wrong with discovering mutual interests. But narcissists outright fake them.

Unfriending As Punishment

I’ve noticed many narcissists unfriend people as punishment. Only to re-friend them soon after. Narcissists don’t really want to lose friends. They need attention too much.

They hope to condition you, like Pavlov’s dogs, to behave how they want. The “punishment” is unfriending. And the “reward” is re-friending. But you’re on probation. Any more nonsense and you’re unfriended again.

The narcissist controls the relationship. THEY choose when you’re friends. And when you’re not.

And because they’re narcissistic, they believe you’re distraught without their friendship. So you’d better buck up your ideas!

Smear Campaigns

Narcissists are notorious for seaming their ex partners when a relationships ends. This is because they no longer have control over their former partner. So they fear they may reveal what they’re really like behind closed doors.

So narcissists smear them to destroy their credibility. They try to create the impression their ex is crazy, unstable, and unreliable. So no one believes them they finally talk.

Social media is perfect for this. Because they can easily reach a wide audience with a touch of a button. And repeatedly tell as many people as possible how crazy their ex is.

Narcissism On Social Media – Final Thoughts

Narcissism on social media goes hand in hand. That’s because narcissists love attention. And they love portraying themselves as pillars of the community. Which are both easy on social media.

Narcissists are all about feeding themselves narcissistic supply. Gaining attention, praise, and proving they’re the best. Social media is a perfect tool for this.

If a narcissist is not on social media, then two possible reasons spring to mind. They either feel they’re “above” social media. Or they have too many secrets they need to keep to themselves. Either from their past, or their present.

Social media presents many golden opportunities for narcissists. So if they don’t participate, you’ve got to wonder why!

Please CLICK HERE For Narcissists Attitudes Towards Sex