Narcissists are “all or nothing” in many areas of their life. And this often applies to their punctuality.

Some narcissists are punctual to the second. And may even arrive super early. Then chastise anyone who’s more than a minute late.

These narcissists feel a superior sense of satisfaction from being on time. And use it to put down “lesser mortals” who arrive late.

However most narcissists are notorious for being late. And keeping people waiting for hours on end.

Lateness ties in with many of the narcissists foibles. And if you’ve been on the receiving end of a narcissists lateness, then it’s usually because of one or more of these things…

Please Check Out The Following Short Video To Aid Your Understanding…

Narcissists Sense Of Entitlement

Narcissists feel entitled to do what they please. And just because they’ve made an arrangement with you, it doesn’t mean they have to honour it. Not to the letter anyway.

Narcissists sense of entitlement means they don’t see the problem with being late. They’re here aren’t they?! You should be grateful they turned up.

Their lack of empathy means they don’t feel for your situation. And they don’t see the hypocrisy when they complain if you’re 5 minutes late. The arrangement was meant to tie you in, not them.

Control

Some narcissists make arrangements to control the other person. The narcissist knows that if you agree to meet at 7pm, you’ll honour it. And this makes them feel warm and fuzzy inside. Safe in the knowledge you’ll be there waiting for them when they decide to show up.

Narcissists see people as commodities to be used. Rather than living breathing people with their own needs.

So instead of rushing to meet you, the narcissist feels free to do other things. Because they know you’re waiting on the back burner. You’re essentially being held by your agreement to meet. And once they’re ready, they’ll bless you with their presence.

If you complain, then the narcissist probably sees this as an attempt to control them. Because you’re trying to stop their wonderful one-sided arrangement.

Instead of apologising for their lateness, narcissists are more likely to kick up a fuss, making you regret saying anything. And this allows them to get away with more of the same in the future. Because it’s not worth the headache of challenging them.

Narcissists Self Importance

Narcissists naturally feel superior and more important than you. So they don’t believe they have to arrive on time. And since you’re beneath them, it’s only right that you wait for them. This is the natural course of things.

If you were meeting the King of England, then it’s highly unlikely you’d arrive late. You’d probably move heaven and earth to get there early. But if you were meeting someone less important, then you might not be quite so vigilant.

Narcissists take this thinking to a whole new level. And may arrive several hours late. Because they’re that much more important than you. And you’re supposed to accept this, because you should respect their importance.

Narcissists Grand Entrance

Narcissists may bolster their feelings of self importance by making a grand entrance. In their mind, nothing’s more grand than arriving later than everybody else. Because it shows that they’re the highest ranking. And everyone’s head turns when they finally show up.

Narcissists may fantasise that everybody’s nervously waiting for their arrival. Like if you were waiting for royalty. And they can stroll in 3 hours late, to cheers and fanfare. Which they might receive, but not for the reasons they like to think! But to a narcissist, even negative attention gives them supply.

Narcissists may also use their lateness as a public show of grandiosity. Because it gives them a chance to explain all the important things that made them late. The kind of things which ordinary mortals don’t have to deal with.

Devaluation

Narcissists might deliberately arrive late to devalue you. To tell you how little you matter.

During a friendship or romantic relationship, narcissists are usually kind and considerate to begin with. But once you’re drawn in, they often try to put you down. It might start as subtle digs, dressed as “jokes”. And it might also be disrespect shown by their actions.

Consistently arriving late can be the narcissists ways of telling you that you don’t matter. And even though they haven’t said it in words, it’s demonstrated by how they treat you.

If you don’t say anything, then you’ve accepted your position as beneath them. And from a psychological sense, this isn’t good.

But if you complain, then the narcissist is unlikely to apologise and try harder next time. They’re more likely to make excuses. And maybe even throw a tantrum. Or play the victim, to make you regret complaining.

After a while, most people ignore narcissists lateness. And accept that it’s the way they are. But it’s not good for the soul. And they certainly wouldn’t like it done to them.

Narcissists Value Their Own Time, But Not Yours

Narcissists place a high value on themselves. And by proxy, their time. And since they place a low value on you, they also place a low value on your time. So the narcissist may deliberately be late, just to waste your time and not theirs.

In some narcissists minds, it’s worth arranging to meet at 7, even though they don’t plan on getting there until 8. Because then it’s guaranteed you’re waiting for them, rather than the other way round. Most narcissists would rather waste an hour of your time, than a few minutes of their own. Nice eh?!

Final Thoughts

Narcissists don’t see a problem arriving several hours late. But may scream blue murder if they wait 5 minutes for you.

Narcissists have a different set of rules for others than they have for themselves. And they don’t see the hypocrisy in it.

If they’re challenged for their lateness, most narcissists get angry. Because deep down they know it’s not fair. But they don’t want their delusions of superiority shattered. And most are smart enough to know that they can’t say it’s because they’re superior. So unless they admit they’re wrong (which isn’t going to happen!), anger is their only option.

Narcissists would rather delude themselves that normal rules don’t apply to them. Rather than face the truth that they’re nothing special. Which is why they continue to be late, no matter what you say or do. And if you live in hope they’ll change, you’ll probably be waiting a long time.

The only chance of them changing is if their lateness has a consequence. For instance, if you leave after waiting 10 minutes. Or you refuse to meet up with them. But this change is often temporary, and you have to work hard on maintaining it. Because they’ll always push at your boundaries.

Interestingly, narcissists are on time when meeting certain people. And may treat them noticeably better than others. Please click the following link for why narcissists treat some people better than others…

Please CLICK HERE For Why Narcissists Treat People Differently

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