Narcissist parents are not like regular parents. They prioritise their own needs above their child’s. And don’t take accountability when this is challenged. Whether that’s when challenged when they’re a child. Or later when they’ve grown up.

I’ve discussed this issue with children of narcissist parents, and found many common phrases that narcissist parents use to avoid accountability.

Here’s a list and explanation of the common phrases narcissist parents use to avoid accountability. Feel free to add yours in the comments at the end…

Please Watch The Following Short Video To Aid Your Understanding…

“So I’m A Terrible Parent…”

Rather than address the issue, they imply you’re accusing them of being a terrible parent. So it switches the focus from them, to you. Because you’re now at fault for questioning their parenting.

This also encourages guilt for saying they’re a terrible parent. Which pushes you on to the back foot. Even though you didn’t actually say they were!

“You Don’t Understand”

This phrase removes your credibility when you complain. And offers no explanation to justify what they said or did.

“I Would Die For You”

This is a theoretical good deed that will probably never happen. Yet they use it to offset treating you badly.

“I Put A Roof Over Your Head”

This implies that you’re ungrateful, since they let you live with them. Regardless of how they treat you. Or that this is the absolute basic requirement, for their role as parent.

“You’ll Understand When You’re Older”

This implies it’s your lack of understanding, rather than their words or actions, that are at fault. Plus it hints that whatever they did was for your own good.

“You Think You Have It bad?”

They may compare your situation with their childhood. Which they probably exaggerate how bad it was. Or they may even compare you with children from third world, or even war torn countries. Like that makes things OK!

“If I’m So Bad, Why Don’t You Leave?”

Narcissist parents know you have little choice but to stay with them when you’re young. Yet they say that it can’t be bad if you choose to stay. So this gives you no choice but to take what they’re dishing out.

“No One Else Thinks That About Me”

This may be because they treat others better than you. Or they may not know what other people think about them. Or they may even be in denial.

“Stop Living In The Past”

The problem is that EVERYTHING that’s happened is in the past. So this phrase can be used to avoid accountability for anything that hasn’t happened right now!

“Why Can’t You Be More Like Your Sister/Brother?”

This implies that you’re at fault, because your sibling doesn’t complain. But this could be because they’re the golden child. Or they’ve learnt to keep quiet. It also shows signs of triangulation.

Gaslighting Phrases

Narcissist parents also use common gaslighting phrases on their children. Please click the following link for common narcissist gaslighting phrases…

Please CLICK HERE For Common Narcissist Gaslighting Phrases

Narcissist Gaslighting Phrases