Comments on: How Narcissists Make You Feel Loved AND Unloved

By: Trisha

Trisha — Sat, 22 May 2021 16:36:13 +0000

Wow, Rachel’s description of being made to feel loved and then unloved as like being on a roller-coaster that makes you feel sick is the perfect comparison! When I was a teenager I enjoyed roller coasters but emotional roller-coasters do make me feel sick.
I don’t mind if people say they hate me. At least then I know where I stand. But that particular person hated me when I did things they didn’t like (such as wear a dress with a skirt even the slightest bit above the knee; I was a regular gym-goer then) but then conveniently forgot that I was a hybrid of the spawn of Satan and the Whore of Babylon when when faced with the prospect of eating lunch or morning tea by herself. Seriously, this person couldn’t stand to spend a 10 minute coffee break without a big group around her.
The piece-de-resistance was when my partner came to meet me to have lunch together. When we sat down at a table with our food, I noticed a group of my colleagues a few tables away including The One Who Couldn’t Stand To Eat Alone so sat quietly and hoped they wouldn’t notice me. But somehow she found out and demanded why I hadn’t joined them. “Oh, I was on a date,” I explained. She scowled and asked what my partner would think of that (every knew that I was part of a couple). “I was a on a date with my partner,” I elaborated, which made her all the more offended.
I don’t know whether that person would qualify for being a narc but, if she was, she would have been a less skilled one because her motives were so transparent. She didn’t like that I kept myself in shape or that I was in a happy relationship. Whereas one of the girls who was my friend had more excuse to be envious because she’d gone through a bad divorce, yet she still managed to be a good friend.
In one of your post you mentioned that narcissists hate spending time alone. That makes me wonder…

By: Fierce Butterfly

Fierce Butterfly — Sat, 22 May 2021 12:42:13 +0000

In reply to Rachel. Hey, its so crazy that I can almost see myself at the same stage it seems maybe you're at now. Indulge your rage and scorn and all that as needed, but don't let that stuff eat you alive. Don't let it make you bitter. That's a win for the enemy. When you can let it go and go on, you will be shocked at how heavy that load was you were carrying all that time. I carried mine a very long time. When I finally put it down, that was a win for me, and surprisingly easy to do. Take care.

By: Fierce Butterfly

Fierce Butterfly — Sat, 22 May 2021 12:35:57 +0000

Wow, you basically described like the past 25-ish years of my life perfectly. First the husband, then the shockingly identical child. Getting free of the husband took a while but that parent-child bond is too strong. And that’s despite the horrific, heartbreaking crap that happens every f__king time, and I still fall for it. I let myself get used and every time she pulls the plot twist I find it actually is possible to break my heart even a little more than last time. And last time was utter devastation. But there’s worse than that, you learn- and it just goes on. There are babies involved in this and I’m terrified for them all. Anyway, thanks for letting me share.

By: JonRhodes

JonRhodes — Thu, 20 May 2021 10:51:55 +0000

In reply to Rachel. I was hoping it wasn't directed at me Rachel! :) Congratulations on your escape!

By: Rachel

Rachel — Wed, 19 May 2021 23:12:13 +0000

This is brilliant! Oh and since I’ve got an overwhelming feeling every move of mine of at least online ones are being followed, then do enjoy reading about your pathetic self . I find it highly amusing now . You think your an enigmatic? Think again . Your utterly transparent and everyone knows it btw .
It was like being on a rollercoaster that made you feel sick . Nothing else . Im glad escaped- and yes even after a discard you were never allowed back . Kudos to me :))
Oh btw . Get a basic education, ie learn how to spell and use terminology you’ve only picked up from things within context .
Always a pleasure to read your posts !!! ( that was directed at narc btw not you xxxx)